Good Hair, An Update

You might remember the second part of my as-yet-unfinished series "The Race Card", which was entitled "Good Hair."
I've been meaning to write a quick update to that post, because a couple things have happened in the last few months that I found particularly relevant. Back in December, while at the post office mailing out late Christmas gifts, I walked up to the counter, which was being attended by a black male employee. After starting to process my parcels, he casually commented that he liked seeing "a sister with natural hair."
My first reaction was to touch my hair self-consciously and reply with a quick, "thank you." But then, after a few seconds of reflection, I said a bit sarcastically, "I could write a book about the way I feel about that subject!" Of course, I didn't tell him that indeed, I had already written a rather lengthy blog post.
"Is that right?" he asked, grinning slightly. "I mean, I don't have a problem with what anyone does with their hair," he went on, looking quickly around the office, presumably for any black women with treated hair who might take offense.
I just smiled, and walked out feeling rather proud of my 'tightly coiled' curly hair. There are still some people left in the world who don't hate on natural black women's hair.

Then, about a month ago, Bryony and I were at a local Borders that was having a "going out of business sale." Because I am super frugal (aka, cheap) and hate to pay full-price for anything, I was scanning the aisles for books I could get for 40% off. Just as I asked a young saleswoman to point me in the direction of the nature section, she stopped me and asked, "Excuse me, but is that your natural hair?"
On that particular day, I had let my hair out of its barrette, so my locks that had dried straight while clasped in the barrette were now flowing freely. I told her that yes, it was my own natural hair. Then she asked if it was naturally that straight. I explained to her that my hair was actually quite curly by nature, much curlier than her own hair or even Bryony's, and that it was only straight because it had dried that way. She asked me to follow her to the health & beauty section of the store, where she grabbed a book entitled Curly Girl. She told me the book had changed her life.
"I used to have hair that was dry and bushy and I never knew what to do with it. It just always felt really unhealthy. Then I started using the method that this book suggests and I get so many compliments on my hair now!" Her long mane of wet-looking curls swayed behind her back.
I gave this girl a once-over. She looked as though she could be biracial, and so while she might have some hair similarities to mine, I felt like she was overestimating the amount we had in common. But, always one to try to keep an open mind, I thanked her, picked up the book and started to flip through it. Sure enough, the author, a white woman who has curly hair herself, wrote the book with curly-haired women and children in mind. One of the over-arching themes of the book is to stop the cycle of self-hate that is perpetuated in our society toward and by curly-haired people. We need to LOVE our curly tops. It was a fun book to skim through, but being the el cheapo that I am, I decided to wait until it was 50% off the following week before purchasing it. Of course, when I returned to the store a few days later to buy it, all three copies had been sold.

No worries, there's always Amazon. And there's always time for me to "work" with my hair a bit more. I just hope that Bryony grows up loving her own curly locks as much as we do. We cannot go anywhere without someone commenting on her hair. Sometimes that's good--a woman or man will stop us to say how much they love her hair, or wish that they had it. Usually, Adam will make a bad joke about wanting some of her hair himself (while pointing to his bald head) or we'll respond with a genuine thank you. And sometimes outsiders' comments aren't so good--they will say things like, "Oh, she's going to hate that hair when she's sixteen!" or "That hair must be SO hard to deal with!" I've just learned to respond positively with "Oh, I think she'll love her hair as much when she's a teenager as we love it now!" or "Nope, her hair is really fun to work with!"

If some people in this world are intent on making her feel bad about her beautiful hair, then I'll make it my job to be the one-woman counterattack force for perpetuating appreciation for curly hair. Just call me the Curly Crusader.